SWITCHBOARD

[transmittable]

If you'd like to ask the Transmitter something over the phone, go right ahead! The Transmitter will answer the phone as soon as she's available. Leaving messages is impossible, given how old these phones are, but you should be able to reach her at almost all hours.

Comments are screened for privacy; all Patients are offered confidentiality, didn't you know?

Comments

[transmittable]

Uhh, don't think so? ...God I sound like such a hipster. There's one just called S I really like. The Depreciation Guild. A lot of bands that only last a few years, or keep changing members.

[arebetter]

Hey, at least you tried. I've got bands like that I dig too, don't worry. Just because The Misfits haven't been indie in a while doesn't mean I stopped paying attention. ... Not that I'm going to be listening to any new music anytime soon in here, but. Whatever.

[transmittable]

Do you like being big? Or like...being in the public eye?

[arebetter]

[ idk you tell me

thank you, cartoon pizzazz's weird size Thing, god ]

Hell yeah. Look, being big comes with its own... stuff, sure, but more people are hearing my music and I have my band to back me up. People know my name, and my music, and it's cool. I fought hard to make the best damn band I could, and well... when I go out on stage, I see a lot of people who agree. And when I'm off, it's with the same band I put together across five different LA dive bars.

But it only works like that because I don't let the fame stuff get to me. Still get in fights, still care about the music we make, don't do... mounds of cocaine, or whatever. The only change I ever made to my rider for shows was upping to three orders of curly fries instead of one.

[transmittable]

[ 80's what the fuck ]

...Curly fries are good. You got me there.

Is this always what you wanted to do with your life? Where you always saw yourself?

[arebetter]

Hell yeah they are. I miss 'em already.

Since I had a plan that wasn't "throw in with Jareth the Goblin King when I grow up," sure. Fell into music after my parents split.

[transmittable]

[ ... ]

When did that happen? Your parents.

[arebetter]

[ ... ]

I was thirteen. That's when they finally bothered to split officially.

[transmittable]

Did anything do it in particular? Or were they just... Was it just messed from the start?

[arebetter]

[ Pizzazz is a practiced interviewee. She has a line for this, and it's generally "none of your damn business," but today that line just isn't coming out. ]

Honestly? They didn't spend enough time around me for me to tell what the final straw was. If there was one.

[transmittable]

...Sorry. I know I hated that question. You just don't meet a lot of other people who's parents split, in my, uh...position.

[arebetter]

It's alright. I got the sense you were asking from experience. When'd it happen for you?

[transmittable]

A few years ago. Older than thirteen, that's for sure.

[arebetter]

Well hey, if you need an outlet for any feelings about it, I hear good things about picking up an instrument.

[transmittable]

[ A laugh. ]

You have to have some kind of talent for that, you know? Some friends tried to get me to pick up, like, anything. Nothing took.

[arebetter]

It's not for everyone. What do you do, hobby-wise? Besides watching us.

[transmittable]

Uhhh. Tic-tac-toe. Crosswords. Spot the difference. There's not a lot to do.

[arebetter]

No shit. Man, if you're doing all the talking for them, the Risen should at least chip in and get you an X-Box or something.

[transmittable]

[ She laughs. It's a little tired. ]

Ohh, X-Box. Video games, I miss thee. We don't have any hookups like that here.

[arebetter]

That's bullshit. Those Risen whatevers really do suck.

[ She looks over her shoulder. ]

Hang on a sec... oh, it looks like we're having a get-together. Great. Guess I should go.

[transmittable]

Do. ...A lot of them are good people. Be out there with them.

[arebetter]

Yeah, well, I'm not great at good people. But I probably should.

[ ... ]

You know, I'd like to hear some of that indie music of yours, if you can get me some. Make me a mixtape and send it with a walkman, whatever.

[transmittable]

A mixtape?

[ She's a little breathless. The static buzzes loudly. ]

I'll see, uh...what I can do. Bye.

[ ...And the Transmitter hangs up. ]