TEXT

[transmittable]

If you'd like to ask the Transmitter something over text, go right ahead! The Transmitter will respond to texts messages as soon as she's available. You will likely get a text back very quickly.

Your tablet device will only reach the Transmitter. There is no option to send texts to anyone else, instead it will connect to automatically to her phone.

Comments are screened for privacy; all Patients are offered confidentiality, didn't you know?

Comments

[transmittable]

and this makes sense. with you as a person and with what i can easily recall. your world's whole situation is honestly what comes up first whenever i think on you.

[enhancements]

What do you think of it? I'm sure you have an opinion one way or another.

[transmittable]

i feel weird about it. like, it's a god awful thing and sounds like a horror story.

but at the same time, i feel detached from it. i have all your memories swimming around, but they aren't easily accessible. it's the kind of thing you compartmentalize. that goes for everyone. things would get a little overwhelming if you didn't, like that first day.

so while i know it's awful and if i stop and think about for more than a few minutes it makes me a little sick to my stomach to imagine, i can still sit here casually like i'm shooting the shit with you.

[enhancements]

Nothing that's happened in my world is anything that you would consider good, I'm assuming - the whole thing is likely varying degrees of horrific.

[transmittable]

probably not. i can understand at the very least why compassion is something of the past for you and yours.

[enhancements]

My mentor really does believe that he's saving the world, you know.

[transmittable]

what's his reasoning?

[enhancements]

Let's say that my mentor is a religious man. One who rather likes the story of Noah's ark.

The logic he was deploying is that the world was going to destroy itself anyway, whether by famine, war, or issues caused by sheer overpopulation. Orchestrating the apocalypse ourselves would take care of all of these problems.

Meanwhile, Umbrella high command and their families are, to my knowledge, all in cryogenic stasis half a mile underground.

[transmittable]

well that is still a bundle of yikes in a mutated basket but i guess a lot of extremists are well-intentioned for a reason.

[enhancements]

Something like that.

Either way, our goals don't really align on that front, though I suppose that's to be expected. Not that it matters anymore, I suppose.

[transmittable]

what'd you remember that makes everything pointless? was it related to him?

[enhancements]

The secret you gave me during our third week here mentioned that there were less than four thousand humans left alive.

As of the most recent thing I've remembered, my mentor and I had to hold off a pair of people for nine minutes in order for those four thousand humans to be destroyed.

[transmittable]

oh. so it's kind of a foregone conclusion as to what happened, huh.

[enhancements]

Just slightly.

[transmittable]

no wonder you were so hopeless sunday morning.

[enhancements]

[...So, anyway- ]

The woman on that video feed you've been showing us is that interesting person I've been telling you about from time to time. Her name is Alice.

The other person I recognize there is my mentor, Dr. Isaacs.

I don't know if you selected them or the Risen did, but I suppose I see why, because I don't have family or loved ones to threaten.

[transmittable]

[ no one said she was particularly good at this- ]

the choices made were them. they're a little better at sorting through the bunches of memories, after all.

you wouldn't even consider your mentor a "loved one?" or something close to one?

[enhancements]

Of course not.

[It seems to have amused him on some level, though; it's closer to a flippant "oh, fuck no" as opposed to anything agitated.]

Dr. Isaacs raised me, more or less, though I don't recall the circumstances surrounding it, nor do I remember my childhood very well. Simply that I don't have family - I believe it was mentioned in passing that I had an older sister at one point, but I don't remember anything about her either - and Dr. Isaacs always made it very clear that he was not to be considered family, before he was aware that I didn't want any sort of attachment like that anyway.

So he's simply always been there as a presence in my life. He brought me into Umbrella when I was old enough to be handed responsibilities, and he trained me to take over the corporation for him eventually. He considered me a good candidate for the experimentation that he was doing with the t-virus, and assisted me with the process of activating it after I infected myself.

That aside, I believe the consensus among High Command - Dr. Isaacs included - is that I will be permitted to live as long as I continue to use my abilities for Umbrella's benefit, but the second I become an inconvenience or our goals are completed and I'm no longer necessary, they're going to see to it that I'm destroyed. They consider me an abomination - one that has no place in their supposedly perfect world that they were trying to create.

[transmittable]

attachment as other people define it is something foreign to you, so that's not much of a surprise, but even on his end, even though he watched you grow, you're still someone to hold at arm's length, emotionally.

you explain it and i dig in and see it but that's still something so strange to me. i guess on some level, i'll probably never understand it, but i can comprehend it well enough.

it would make sense that the people who are most important to you in any way are the ones the risen chose, i guess.

[enhancements]

I'm sure there's something to be said for not understanding it, in some way or another. Bluntly put, we aren't normal, sane people - it's just a fact that no one who could be considered such would have the ideas and plans that we've been enacting even cross their minds as a possibility, much less a viable solution to anything.

I'm not surprised that you don't understand things like that, in other words.

[transmittable]

i'll give you that. wipe out the majority of the world and start again is the kind of thing i'd see in stories back home as the ultimate cynicism.

on that note you're way more aware of all of this than i would expect? i don't know, in all those stories, those characters wouldn't have such a grasp on the differences and how they could be seen as separate.

[enhancements]

I'm not laboring under the delusion that I'm doing the right thing. Nor do I share in the one that most of Umbrella seems to be experiencing.

What this comes down to is obtaining what I want. Whether what I want is good for the world or not is of no consequence to me, which I'm aware puts me solidly on the wrong side of the conflict. Good people don't think that way.

[transmittable]

what really is it that you want? an interesting life? a life without humans?

[enhancements]

It's not enough for me to simply live without humans.

I want to see them destroyed. I want them wiped out, but I want it to specifically be because of me. I want to be content in the knowledge that I changed the world as I saw fit, and I want to stay with my creations after the fact.

That would be ideal, I think.

[...He's...really fucked up, um.]

[transmittable]

[ ...So you know how she's been enjoying talking to him? It's like- HUH this sure is something! ]

well

gotta shoot for the stars don't ya? that sure is a dream to have.